Date of Submission

Spring 2024

Academic Program

Film and Electronic Arts

Project Advisor 1

Ben Coonley

Abstract/Artist's Statement

I find that we tend to take ourselves too seriously. Humor and self-awareness is something I fear we severely lack. We are living through an age of complete absurdism, and I often find myself leaning into ridiculousness for comfort and pleasure.

I wanted to make “Bootlicker” in hopes of bringing some levity to other creatives who also struggle when devising their next piece of work. The production of art, especially high art, can be comparable to a magic trick – we herald the artist or director for miraculously and seemingly effortlessly creating art. The process of which is usually romanticized, sometimes even analyzed. The great artists are then championed for their intellect, innovation and creativity within their respective mediums. During my time as a student in liberal arts education, I have come to understand that this status of artist or auteur is something to be desired. I believe notoriety is one of the objectives for many of my peers, and I would be lying if I said I didn’t also dream of this. However during my time here, I have been subjected time and time again to the ego of the artist. Countless conversations with my peers discussing either how other people don’t understand their artwork or a refusal to accept criticism on it.

Take all of what I’m saying with a grain of salt, for I can guarantee that I have also had trouble managing my ego. Yet, I feel that I’ve come to understand the relative ridiculousness of it all, which has offered me sources of comfort and peace. Those with such inflated egos that they can neither hear criticism nor accept that their knowledge of art may not be as vast as they had hoped. Refusing to validate others opinions or standings simply under the basis that it doesn’t align with theirs. This is the very nature of liberal arts school of course, to discuss and rival artists and concepts. All that being said, I can’t help but laugh. My objective is not to ridicule or make fun of the incredibly talented creative students here or their efforts in making art. I honestly believe that every artist needs to be a little vain in order to succeed, however I also strongly think that everybody should have the ability to laugh at themselves.

“Bootlicker” is an extreme example of such pretension. I wanted to have the character be almost cartoonishly insufferable, to lean into absurdism. I have never encountered somebody as narcissistic as the character I portray, but still, I hope that viewers can see a small part of themselves within this character. Much of the dialogue for the film was accumulated from actual conversations I had overheard and recorded during my time here. The scene at the basketball gym was especially unchanged from the original recording in which I heard it. I knew from the start I wanted this film to be a dry satire, being inspired by the awkward and self-deprecating slow cinema of Ruben Öslund’s films. I hadn’t originally intended to play the protagonist, however in a meeting with one of my tutors prior to any concrete plan I had we talked about placing certain restrictions on myself while shooting to heighten certain themes, similar to the “Dogma 95” movement. I wanted to accentuate this theme of self centeredness and narcissism through only having the lead’s face visible throughout the whole film. Every other character either has their back turned to the camera or their face is obstructed in some way. With this challenge I would need an actor to play the lead who had extensive amounts of free time, that role inevitably was placed upon me. This unintentionally, I feel, added another meta layer to the project. I was playing a pretentious film student struggling to make a film while also being a film production major struggling to create my senior project. The whole thing got very confusing for me. But my hopes are to have people question whether I was just playing myself or not. Possibly committing social suicide. In a paradoxical way, it's arrogant to make a film in which I play the lead and also can only see my face. Yet I’m displaying myself in the most despicable and vile way. It's a fine line as to whether this project is incredibly vulnerable or vain.

Ultimately, I believe we need to be more self-effacing. Laugh at yourselves and your own work. Not to a hopeless degree, but enough so that the stress or expectations of notoriety and success become nothing more than afterthought rather than the goal.

Open Access Agreement

On-Campus only

Creative Commons License

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